Another ludicrous day, dear reader. The was a kerfuffle, at one point, with 20 – 30 angry-for-no-apparent-reason wild turkeys. Arrogant, wattle-havin’ motherfuckers. Fortunately they came to their collective senses before I had to get all apex predator on them. Nervy little bastards. Oh yeah, when they’re all together in a rafter, they’re all thuggish. But you get one of them alone, it’s Thanksgiving all over. Which, by the way, was just a few months ago. You’d think they’d learn. If all of one species in my neighborhood feasted on all of my species one day out of the year, I would tread pretty lightly the rest of the year. They should talk to the skunks and the racoons…those goddamn racoons may have left the area completely after our last conversation.
I like animals well enough, but all the animals around here seem to be assholes. Maybe I’ll install a bat house under the eves…kill off the mosquito population, freak out the neighbors, and bats aren’t assholes. Yes. It’s decided. Coming this summer to The Haunt: Bat House.
N.P.: “Just One Kiss” – Imelda May, Noel Gallagher, Ronnie Wood