Monthly Archives: April 2020

It is truly impressive to see how many of my fellow Americans have become both medical experts as well as constitutional scholars in just a few short weeks.  I feel like such an underachiever.  I’ve just been wasting my time sitting here writing amazing books.
Anyway, the writing is going well.  The word count is up.  As is the whiskey consumption.  Coincidence?  I think so.

N.P.: “Mama, I’m Coming Home” – Ozzy Osbourne

Kind of a flat-line of a day, dear reader.  Nothing great happened, not terrible happened.  Wrote some stuff, watched some stuff, and leftovers.  Of course it was Wednesday, and nothing great ever happens on Wednesdays.
I did get a chance to rewatch “6 Days to Air – the Making of South Park” which I found very inspirational.  Maybe “motivational” is more accurate.  Anyway, I highly recommend.
Still loving the lock-down.  Seriously, I was kind of designed for this.  It’s weird, I know.  Anyway, I hope all is well with you.

N.P.: “The Sundown” – Ennio Morricone

I’m finally starting to use dictation with much more regularity than I have been.  Doing so gives me roughly 3 times the number of words I get typing or handwriting.  And other than minor editing due to mistakes caused by shortcomings with the software, I don’t have to change much, and I use the vast majority of it.  There are a couple of things I need to perfect, and a few kinks I need to work out, but I’m going to be using dictation a lot more.
Also, it’s hotter than hell.  It is April.  We are not amused.

N.P.: “Aurora surrealis” – Tid

Jayson Gallaway

April 27, 2020

There is cause for celebration, dear reader: the state of California has canceled its insipid State Fair. I cannot begin to describe the happiness this announcement brings me. I would drink deeply in honor of this development had I not run out of desk whiskey Saturday afternoon.  Now they simply need to ban the sale of fireworks and cancel Fourth of July celebrations and this will be one of the the best summers evar.

N.P.: “Pacific Coast Highway in the Movies” – AWOLNATION, Weezer

Today wasn’t quite as lazy as yesterday, but I won’t be receiving any productivity awards for today, either.  I got a little writing done.  Didn’t even start any of the projects I thought I might start today.  I have higher hopes for tomorrow.

N.P.: “Midnight Moonlight” – The Firm

Ludicrously lazy day, dear reader.  I’m embarrassed to even tell you about it.  Might have gone too hard on the Whiskey whilst I was making the wings.  Alas.  Occupational hazard.  Didn’t write shit.  But there’s still hope for today: I’m not particularly tired.  I am also out of whiskey.

N.P.: “# W W C” – The Main Squeeze

As the nights are getting shorter, I’m starting to value the darkness more.  [And I ain’t even tryin’ to be goth, yo.]
Weird day.  The heat is pissing me off.  Got a couple of ideas for writing, but I just opened files for them to be worked on at a later date.  Maybe tomorrow, after Whiskey & Wings.

N.P.: “Don’t It Make Ya Feel” – Headpins

I’m disgusted by what I see in the forecast: not a drop of rain and temperatures that start with 9.  I just murdered a big-ass spider in my foyer.  Why was there a big-ass spider in my foyer?  Funny, dear reader, I asked myself that exact question about a half a second before I dispatched the creature back to the hell from whence it came.  I guess will never know.
I wish I was in Norway.  There aren’t any spiders in Norway.

N.P.: “Everything” – Sunset Neon

Jayson Gallaway

April 22, 2020

Each time you light your lighter, your lighter gets lighter until your lighter is too light to light.

During this time of regular daily televised updates by various municipal, state, and national officials, I have developed an entirely new appreciation for the comedic theater art that is sign language interpretation.  I’ve become so fixated with the almost kabuki-like expressions employed by these good folks during these pressers…it’s amazing and oftentimes hilarious.  I’m sure there is a very legitimate reason for them doing this, and am admittedly totally ignorant about the whole sign language deal other than I think it’s great that our deaf brethren can be informed by watching TV, but I have become so fixated on the various interpreters that I don’t really hear any of the message being conveyed.  I’m trying to think of a way to make a drink game around their faces, but I can’t come up with anything that wouldn’t get everyone completely shithoused inside of five minutes.  Then again, some people might say that is the definition of a good drinking game.  Especially now, when everybody’s either out of work or working from home, day drinking is not only totally acceptable but really de rigueur.

I heard some pathetic moans about Earth Day today.  All of the stupid rallies were gloriously cancelled due to the high likeliness that all hippies are currently simply swimming with disease.  They really are.  That aside, however, I’ve never understood Earth Day.  You don’t really mean it.  You can’t.  In order for it to be legitimate, you need to not only have other options, but to have thoroughly explored those options.  But this is in all probability the only planet you’ve ever actually lived on.  How do you know it’s all that great?  Saturn is fucking lovely this time of year…spend some time up there and you might think boring old Earth ain’t really all that.  But also you probably don’t have a choice.  I mean, it’s not like if you get pissed off at the earth that you can leave it and call the lawyers.  You’re stuck here.  So celebrating Earth Day is rather like giving the spouse you are in a loveless arranged marriage with anniversary flowers if that spouse was in a coma and had no idea what you were doing (I really hope the hippies don’t think the earth actually knows that’s it’s Earth Day or that it’s being celebrated).  Anyway, that’s why I think Earth Day is stupid.  Earth itself isn’t much better.  It actually kind of stinks.  It’s not nearly as rank as Uranus, but, of course, nothing is.

N.P.: “Never Dance Again” – Sunset Neon, Blue Stahli

Spent the day in the studio.  Been spending most days that way lately.  Which is great…I just don’t know when I’m gonna be able to work on the base for this year’s tan.  I hope you’re continuing to do well, dear reader.

N.P.: “Kiss” – Sunset Neon