Goddammit, dear reader…I’ve about had it with this current batch of Americans. They don’t even know who the fuck they are. Blind, clueless slaves to the media, social and corporate.
Whenever I do corporate work, I find myself on these teams with guys in their 20s and 30s who are just a fucking mess. They all kinda look the same…they seem to have an unofficial uniform that extends beyond clothing. They are typically average height, many I see are actually rather tall. But they are inevitably doughy. Chubby. Shoulder length straight hair. Beards. Glasses. Maybe earrings or a nose ring or some other facial piercing that seems obligatory. Their eyes (or at least the look in their eyes) is decidedly more bovine than lupine. Their clothing is aggressively nondescript: plaid shirts and khakis, who even cares what kind of shoes. Fifteen, twenty years ago, they would have sported the occasional ironic t-shirt, but they’ve since let themselves be taught that words are offensive, so today they just go with good old, safe, politically correct plaid. They all live alone in small, shitty apartments, and they tend to have cats. Those are the objective ingredients. What is less objective but omnipresent is, if not an abjective effeminate glaze to their entire presence and identity, certainly a decidedly unmasculine one. Not just in their movements and mannerisms, but in their entire world view. I’m typically honestly surprised when they eventually inform me that they are, in fact, straight. They are vehemently non-confrontational (unless they think they’re “standing up” to something that might be offending a black person or woman, and that always ends in embarrassment), which makes them (whether consciously or not) loudly conformist. They’re all alarming ignorant of any history or civics, and they can’t even tell you what critical thinking is. They get their talking points from CNN and find out what is permissible to laugh about from SNL, and then are almost proud of their complete ignorance of any other subject. Almost all of them loudly tout being on some moronic diet: vegan, vegetarian, paleo, neolithic, whatever. If they do actually adhere to these diets (remember the chubbiness mentioned supra…that does not typically happen with anyone who’s been on a vegan diet for not too very many months), I hear about it a lot more than I see it in actual practice. In all likelihood, no one will ever see it in actual practice: no one hangs out with these dudes, socially. They don’t even hang out with each other. Which ends up being the problem: they can’t get a date.
There are (typically) far more women than men on these teams, and these women breakdown demographically (age-wise) pretty much exactly the same as the men: twenties and thirties. Bunch of ’em are married, engaged, or otherwise attached in relationships, and there’s no reason to think there would be more lesbians than gay men on this team, so there are typically several single hetero women on any given team of 20 or more. So the numbers are there for these guys. And these ladies are absolutely looking to hook up/date/get in a relationship. I know this because they tell me the first chance they get because I’m pretty sure these ladies are under the same impression that I was, that their single male coworkers seem to be gay. But that’s what happens: the first break, certainly at the first after-work get-together at any kind of bar, they’re gathered around, telling me (and presumably anyone else within earshot) how single they are. And these dudes…these bearded, bespectacled, doughy, effeminate, desperate dudes will be there on the break, or at the after-work get-together, but they seem to stay huddled to themselves in some other corner of the bar, sipping wine or something worse called White Claw, talking about fantasy role-playing games or diet trends or whatever. The whole thing is just weird as hell.
What’s even weirder is, these guys, who are witnessing all this, can’t figure it out for themselves. In fact, they usually seem desperate for advice, but I’m usually desperate to get out of the situation. And I don’t usually get to know these people well enough to give them the kind of advice they really need. But the couple times I even began to venture, they immediately freaked out, as if I was asking them to do something completely unrealistic. If they were receptive to Zen lessons, they would understand as they were protesting that the fact that they’re protesting is exactly the problem. But they aren’t capable of that sort of understanding, and I end up feeling like the guy re-entering Plato’s cave to tell the other captives about this entire other world outside, and then being derided as insane by the idiots I’m trying to free. One such idiot asked me today what dating service I’d recommend. Bro, there ain’t a dating service in existence that is going to be able to help you…you are the problem. Here, then, is the best advice I can give to “the bros” (and if this offends you, good…you need it): don’t be woke. Honestly. And totally seriously. Knock it off. Rather than dissect the whole pathetic ideology falsehood by falsehood, just, for a second, go with me here and forget what you think you know about politics. And especially forget what you think you know about what straight women are looking for in a man, especially liberal hippies. Straight women are straight women, regardless of their socio-political leanings, and they want men who masculine. Strong, confident, decisive, and intelligent. And yes, aggressiveness (in the psychological sense) is a key masculine trait. The way most of the mammalian world is set up, adult females do the hunting and take care of the babies, and the male enables all of that to happen by keeping the adult females and babies safe from myriad ever-present predators. Of course, there are variations on this theme, but that is generally the theme. And things are that way because that is what we do: males are terrible at having babies and nursing, and successfully fending off male attackers is not something females are usually capable of. There are, very obviously, physical reasons for this: females have uteri and lactating breasts, and men’s musculature renders them physically “stronger.” In addition to this, there are hormonal/psychological factors, with females being more nurturing and males being more aggressive. Because if the caretaker of the babies deals with them aggressively, and the protector of the family deals with predators nurturingly, everyone in the pack will be killed. Which is exactly how Darwin wants it. And even the most liberal hippy chick in Berkeley knows it’s true…sure, they might give your woke ass a piece after whatever bullshit protest, but deep down, they want a strong, confident, decisive, intelligent man who makes them feel safe, secure, and comfortable.
You are giving them the exact opposite. Long term, you need to get back in touch with your animalistic, masculine side. Start drinking whiskey on the reg…you need to condition yourself so that at the next outing, you can walk in and drink whiskey like a goddamn man. Do something competitive, where scores are kept and performances are rated…learn to accept valid criticism while taking absolutely no shit off of anybody. Lose arguments and get ridiculed, and then learn to get pissed off about it. Get stronger. Short term, if your email signature has preferred pronouns, it may be too late for you, but if not, punch yourself in the nose really hard, take a shot of whiskey, and get that bullshit off of there. (Jesus! Seriously…what the fuck is wrong with you people?) If you wear glasses, don’t have facial hair, and if you have facial hair, don’t wear glasses. Get rid of any facial piercings. Quit making decisions based on what the group thinks…fuck the group…they’re incompetent and weak. Get truly comfortable going places alone…I mean walking into group/social settings by yourself.
Another grossly underestimated (and underused) factor in human attraction (and I believe this applies to both genders equally) is the element of mystery. And this is still another area that wokeism totally destroys. You idiots have been trained to broadcast everything about yourselves as loudly as possible as early as possible after meeting. Shut the fuck up! Order a whiskey and drink it slowly, looking mildly amused at the yammering of those around you, and you’ll quickly come across as the “strong, silent type” even if you’re really not. Then, of course, the next step would be to actually become the strong, silent type.
Okay…I could go on for days about how screwed up millennials and zoomers are, but there are books to write.
N.P.: “Walk Like A Panther – 7″ Version” – The All Seeing