Monthly Archives: October 2020

Tonight is a full, blue moon, those of us in California turn our clocks back to real, standard time, we are over a month into fall, and this is the least Halloweeny Halloween ever.  Still, we are pleased about the time return and the fact that we’ll be waking up in November.  Now if The Rain would just show up.

N.P.: “Blood in the Cut” – K.Flay

As promised, dearest reader, nary an adventure was had today.  Didn’t even leave the house.  Didn’t finish the corporate thing, but I shall, no doubt, be forgiven.

N.P.: “People Are Strange” – Johnny Hollow

So there’s this corporate thing I’m working on, and it’s probably technically overdue at this point.  So today was Finish The Fucking Project Day.  I actually set an alarm.  Yeah…serious business.  So the keys were clacking when the phone rang.  It was a number that has been calling rather a lot lately, so I decided to invectively bludgeon whomever was on the other end of the line.   It was some random Filipino wanting to talk about managing my electronic publishing rights.  He was an obsequious little toad who annoyingly kept calling me “Sir Jayson” and referring to my “most amazing book.”  I quickly got pissed off, insulted and threatened both him and his miserable family, and hung up.  At that point, I was upset.  Too upset to productively work on the corporate thing.  So I decided the most prudent thing to do to calm down quickly was drink whiskey, so I made a Jack & Coke Icee.  Which was (forgive me, dear reader) fucking delicious.  A little too delicious because I dispatched it rather quickly and became a little drunk and a lot awesome.  Which was potentially good for the corporate thing, because now I could give it a little bit of the edge that it (like all corporate writing) was lacking.  But it was problematic because I had a noon meeting with Manolo The Mexican From Mexico about a bulk ammo purchase, and I was now in all likelihood too borracho to drive (legally).  Fortunately Manolo The Mexican From Mexico es muy simpatico, so we were able to reschedule, but I was going to be dealing with his cousin Pedro, who was presumably also a Mexican From Mexico (but I guess not The Mexican From Mexico), who has a cleft palate and an unbelievably high and nasally voice.  Throw in a Covid mask and minimal command of Ingles and the transaction was a bit difficult in parts.  But we got it done.  But you know what didn’t get done?  The fucking project!
What is tomorrow…Friday?  There will be no adventures tomorrow.  No Filipino randos starting publishing companies, no whiskey (I’m out after today), no Mexicans from Mexico (or anywhere else for that matter), no shady arms deals in strip mall parking lots.  There is only the project.

N.P.: “Gravedigger” – MXMS

Today was…I don’t know what the hell today was.  I was too busy to drive around that stupid traffic circle.  That feels more like a Saturday thing, anyway.

N.P.: “Long in the Tooth – Praga Khan Mix” – PIG vs. Primitive Race

Reader Mail.

Dear Jayson,
Are you aware of any laws regarding the number of times one can drive around a traffic circle without driving on in one direction or another?  Does that make sense? Like, you know traffic circles, right? So you’ve got to drive around part of the circle and get of at whatever outlet leads to your destination.  But can you just drive around the thing multiple times, or is that against the law?  It must be against the law, otherwise people would do it all the time. Like a victory lap or something.
Guccci Dome

What’s crackin’, Mr. Dome,
This is perhaps the best question I’ve ever gotten.  And thus is one that truly deserves an answer.  I called my attorney this afternoon to get an official “legal” answer, but he just called me names and lectured me about the time difference between California and Israel.  And so much for all that.  I’m afraid, Gooch…is that cool, if I call you Gooch?  I’m afraid, Gooch, that we’re left with one option: there is one of those insipid traffic circles in Old Town Anhedonia, so tomorrow afternoon, I’m going to break off whatever writing I’m doing and I’m going to climb into the Panty Dropper, head to Old Town, enter the traffic circle, and Go For It.  The traffic circle is in full view of APD Headquarters, so I’m guessing that if there is some arbitrary limit to how many times one may go around a traffic circle without exiting, Anhedonia’s Finest will let me know.  I will let you know of my findings tomorrow.

N.P.: “Trick or Treat” – Grace

Everybody is bored.  And having trouble accurately keeping track of time.  I think it’s the fact that every day is basically exactly the same, that there is no significant difference between weekdays and weekends is a big part of it.
I’m doing okay with it.  I’ve been viewing it as a kind of psychology experiment…”What will these people do?”  Something I have learned is that nearly all of my introvert friends weren’t really introverts…they started buckling back in March, almost immediately.  I’ve learned that I am absolutely an introvert…like I’m good at it.  Kinda thriving in this environment, to be honest.  It’s interesting…you know all the ways I’m “eccentric” and weird in the “normal” world?  I make complete sense in a crisis.  Everybody else gets “eccentric” and weird and freaks out…me?  Calm as a Hindu cow.
Anyway, wrote a bunch today.  There’s been a delay in the computer I’m building for the new studio…that might not be done until November.  But that’s cool…I can keep working on these old ones in the interim.

N.P.: “Mad World” – Me and My Nightmare

I have a general dislike for Sundays.  Always have.  According to the Bible, even God takes Sundays off.  If you believe in that sort of thing.  I dislike Sundays even if I don’t have to work on Monday.  I didn’t work a Monday for about 20 years, and I still never got on board with Sundays.

N.P.: “Dead Man’s Party” – Oingo Boingo

Sudan normalized relations with Israel this week, and nobody seemed to notice.  Had I relied on the U.S. media, I would have missed it myself.  But this is massive.  The terms of the deal allow Sudan to come off of the U.S.’s state sponsors of terrorism list, which is the first step to badly needed debt relief.
Look for Jordan and Oman soon, hopefully, soon, at some point, to be followed by Saudi Arabia.  Once that happens, it’s done.
People have been trying (and failing) to achieve peace in this region for centuries, and now that it’s happening: crickets.

N.P.: “House of Doom” – Black Label Society

Today I heard a noise outside, so I looked, and it was leaves blowing down the street.  You know what that means, dear reader…yes, fall is finally fucking here.  California summers are like that one asshole that just won’t leave the party though it’s clear he’s overstayed his welcome.  Summer here is just rude.  I have friends in other states who have been sending me pictures of the snow in their yards for weeks.  I’m stuck here acting giddy when a couple of leaves blow down the street.  Guess I’ll take it.

N.P.: “I Love My Radio – Us Remix” – Taffy