Ten days into 2014 and thus far I am simply putting it to the items on my New Years Resolutions list. Things like drinking (last year I could dispatch 3 Jack and Cokes in rapid succession without displaying any effects of inebriation such that anyone notices…I think this year that number should grow to 5), and pornography (I should be producing far more than I have been recently) have been dealt with handily. At this rate I am on track to have all of my resolutions completed by the end of the month.

One of my resolutions is to finally start replying to some of the reader emails that have been darkening my inbox for over a year now.

Getting “fan” mail has always been far and away the most interesting part of being published. The morning after my first story was published on Salon.com, I woke to find 53 emails waiting for me (previously, any more than 5 emails in a day would have been considered hectic). The first letter in the queue was from the United Arab Emirates. It was a very simple yet wonderfully mystifying note which read, “can you get white women make fuck us so happy.”

Ever since that moment, I have had a deep and abiding admiration and love for my readers. Soon people were attaching nekid pictures of themselves. Then came the videos. Then someone sent me a finger. Indeed. Continue reading →