I’ve never been a fan of Gavin Newsom, not even he first showed up on my radar in the San Francisco days.  I was a big fan of his ex-wife before he showed up, back when she was an assistant D.A.  For a couple of years there most of the crimes I committed were done with at least the partial hope of ending up being prosecuted viciously and sexily by Miss Guilfoyle, but not matter how hard I tried, I could never seem to get caught.  But that’s another story for another day.

In the brief time that Newsom has been Governor of the Crap State of California, he has managed to make all that was already bad somehow significantly worse, and even the good things that he has touched have immediately turned to shit.  I am loath to waste a Sunday afternoon enumerating the innumerable fuckups this putz has unleashed upon his hapless electorate, so I’ll just pick two to mention here, and then I have drinking to do.

First Fuck Up: Placing an executive moratorium on California’s death penalty, thus granting a reprieve for the 737 assholes sitting on death row right now.  Just for the record, had I been Governor, I would have issued an executive order mandating the execution of everyone on death row within 90 days.  That would work out to 8-9 or a day, which would certainly keep certain people very busy for 3 months, but it could be done.  After that, anyone receiving a death sentence would be given an automatic expedited appeal (the appellate court would have no more than 30 days to adjudicate the appeal), and, if the death sentence stands, the execution would be carried out before sun rises the day after the appellate court decision is issued.  The world would be a very different place if I was in charge.

Anyway, I could rail against the stupidity of Newsom’s decision here, but in instances when someone else says something better than I can, I defer to their words.  With that in mind, here is Sheriff Bell of nearby Placer County:

The Sheriff mentioned Luis Bracamontes, whom I would enthusiastically execute myself, but also getting a free ride here due to the Governor’s idiocy are Lonnie Franklin (The Grim Sleeper – 25 murders), Rodney Alcala (The Dating Game Killer – 100+ murders), Cary Stayner, Scott Peterson, Richard Allen Davis, and Charles Ng.

Totally alienating (and pissing off) the entirety of law enforcement in your state as well as the Departments of Corrections and Justice might be enough for some governors, but this asshole is just getting started.

Second Fuck Up:  This week, Governor Jackass signed a bill mandating California’s residents now be taxed on internet purchases.  It has long been the belief (like since 2000, back when I was trying to get prosecuted by Kimberly) of both me and my associates that whomsoever began taxing internet purchases in California would likely be the Antichrist.   Mr. Newsom is not nearly diabolical or even interesting enough to be the Antichrist.  He’s just a putz.  Now he has alienated not only several Silicon Valley giants but also pretty much all of us who purchase things online.

First he fucked up KG, and I had to abandon my hopes there.  Then he fucked up San Francisco , and I had to abandon my hopes there.  Now he is fucking up California, and I will undoubtedly have to abandon my hopes here (which is not that big of a deal…not too many hopes for California anyway).  And I know this weenie has presidential aspirations.

We are not amused.

N.P.: “Narayan” – The Prodigy