Calling it “animal protein” changes nothing: that is meat you are eating. Mmmmm…yeah…delicious. It is the red, bloody flesh of something that used to moo and dream.

A famous musician once told me that he doesn’t eat meat because he thought he would “inherit the dreams” of the animals he ate. I immediately doubled my meat consumption. Turns out he was wrong. Unless cows and pigs routinely dream of belly dancers. I expanded my palette to include exotic beasts, like alligator and crocodile, deer and elk. I hoped to dream of stalking the bayous in Louisiana or lying in wait in an African wadi for a baby zebra to get thirsty. No dice. More belly dancers.



Anyway, eat your meat. Own it. Deal with it. Drink whiskey with it. And get your goddamn kids vaccinated.