Good evening, dearest reader. And happy Columbus Day. It’s allegedly almost Halloween.
I must confess I’m finding it somewhat difficult getting into the spirit of the fucking season when it’s 92 goddamn degrees outside. But what is one to do except bitch. So bitch I shall: It’s too hot for October!
There. I feel better.
As long as I’m downloading, here, wanna know what else is pissing me off? People saying “perfect” at me every time I’m forced to have an interaction with a female under 30. Holy Jesus.
I’ve got a pretty healthy ego, but I’ve never been under the delusion that I am anywhere near perfect or that I have done or will ever do anything perfectly. Ever. So why oh why must I be not simply told, but really rhetorically bludgeoned by Gen Z women telling me absolutely every single thing that I do, down to the most mundane task, like signing a form, was “perfect”?
This nonsense started a couple years ago, but was generally limited to lesser-educated mall employees and the like. And since I only found myself in malls only once every year or two, it was tolerable. But then, during the pandemic, everybody got noticeably more stupid. And “Perfect” evidently became ubiquitous.
I’m now hearing it several times a day, in response to the most innocuous things. It’s like these women have been taking lessons from manically medicated Valley girls or something. I’m beginning to think they’re doing it on purpose, just to annoy me.
Or maybe they really are that stupid. Either way, it’s driving me up the wall. I was talking to my new friend and driver Jerry about this, and his suggestion was…typical of him: “Dude…I know…it’s driving me crazy too. Fortunately, I’m a man who is slowly learning how to deal with this. I don’t want to get too graphic, but one of the more effective things I’ve found to shut these annoying twits up is to grab them by their upper arms and shake them until their teeth rattle like loose change in a beat up penny jar. It puts them in their place, and does wonders for my mental state. I know you’re more “sensitive” than I am, but even though I know it might feel “wrong” when you first try it, don’t let that stop you. This “perfect” shit has already gotten out of control…if you and I don’t start doing our part to rein it in, I shudder to think of how things will be in three months, hell, in three weeks!”
Though I take his point, and even concur, his suggested methods are a bit much. But still…I get where he’s coming from. Anyway, if we can please all knock it off with the “perfect” all the goddamn time, that would be great. Otherwise Jerry’s just going to keep shaking people.
N.P.: “Hunter’s Moon” – Ghost
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